LIAR!

Over the past year, I have developed a very bad habit. Like most bad habits, it started from something small and innocent. Something as innocent as a joke intended for a quick laugh. However, not recognizing that I have a short term memory, I failed to expose this lie as a joke.

The outcome: A shocking surprise for the intended recipient a month later when that long overdue expose’ finally and accidentally came about through general conversation. It was a situation that I found humorous even after apologizing for the late revealing. I became very interested and intrigued by the art of the joke. Not necessarily the funny quip type joke, but the classic misleading type of joke.  
A well-executed joke of this nature requires a few elements. Timing, believability, and an imaginative mind. For a lengthier joke, it requires a good act behind it. It is an art form. Its perfection is proven by mislead perceptions and how far they were misled. I really began to dive into this new interest and practiced the “art”.

The problem is that no matter what the reason, at the foundation of the joke there is still a lie. The joke is constructed around that lie in order to make it a little bit more attractive and seem less harmful. A lie is simply a manipulation of the truth. So in other words, I became a liar.

I began experiencing a problem that somewhat offended but at the same time, intrigued and humored 

me even more. The problem is that nobody really trusts a liar/joker. After responding to any inquiry, I was responded to with doubt and questions of validation of my response. Sometimes I joked more, sometimes I didn’t. Even through the humor that others sometimes found, there was a seed of mistrust planted and every lie was water for nourishment of said seed.

There is a very thin line between the foundation of the joke and the joke itself. That line tends to get blurred over time. That mistrust that I mentioned before begins to further grow and it grows past the walls of words. The question in a person’s mind becomes, “if one can lie so easily about something small, I wonder how much farther that lie can go?”

Anybody who really knows me knows that I pride myself on my integrity. I have always been %100 honest where it’s more socially acceptable to lie. I do something, I acknowledge and accept whatever the consequences for my actions. I don’t hide behind lies. I’m very quick to tell the truth even in situations where something is on the line. I give credit where it’s due in all honesty even when it would be most beneficial to get ahead.

Being a man of few accomplishments so far, my integrity is something that I’ve always taken a lot of pride in. I protect it with everything. Anything that would sabotage or question that integrity is something that needs to be dealt with. So I’m going to clear the air. During this time of “jokes” I have never lied in order to lift myself up.

I refused to lie to get ahead

I refused to lie to keep myself out of trouble

I refused to lie to make myself look better.

Djuan and Mary Kelly taught me much better than that and instilled a foundation of honesty in their son.  
That being said, I am turning over a new leaf. The lies may have been jokes. People may just see it as humorous. It may not even be as serious to anyone else as I am making it out to be. However, I do not want to be, nor would my parents want me to be known or remembered as someone whose words you can’t trust. I will still joke around, but that’s something that has to be cleaned up…I refuse to be a liar.